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Reading Mike: The Annotated Bailey: Chapter 8, page 148
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Commentary |
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[148]
8 Terese and Cher |
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| the "mommy" when playing house, and
avoided the rough boy sports. His best friends were girls. (In all these
senses, he was just like Danny, whom we met earlier. Danny probably will
not become transsexual, though he will probably become a gay man. Why most
very feminine boys grow up to be gay men and a few get sex changes is not
known, though Ill speculate about it later.) |
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Although his friends were mainly girls, Jose
was also intensely interested in boys, especially when he got to junior
high. He began having crushes on them, especially the athletes, and even
some of his male teachers. He never experienced sexual feelings for a girl
or woman. When he was 13, an older boy initiated Jose into sex. Jose is
certain that the older boy is now a gay man. He had several gay partnersTerese
calls this her "gay boy" phasebut began to notice that he
did not find other gay boys or men to be particularly attractive. They were
too feminine. Jose was much more attracted to the straight men that he met.
Also, Jose did not like it when others touched his penis (or even when he
touched it himself). He preferred giving others oral sex, or being penetrated
anally, though this latter activity frequently hurt.
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When he was fourteen, Jose found some gay friends
with similar inclinations toward femininity. They began going out to parties,
or shopping, in drag. It was fun to get away with cross-dressing. Jose was
a late maturer, with a smooth complexion and no facial hair, so he passed
well. And the straight men he met when in drag frequently pursued him. This
was exciting but frustrating, because obviously, Jose could not let them
complete their advances.
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Jose was lucky to be well liked at school, and so he was not
teased as mercilessly as many very feminine boys. But his family was not
happy with his development. His father met him after many years and told
him to "stop acting like a girl." His mother was also disturbed
and worried that he would be gay. As he got older, he made more of an effort
to appear masculine, though he kept his hair long. Pictures from this time
show Jose to be a rather androgynous young man, but clearly a man.
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